A choice for life
Eric Santos |
You can't meet Allen Thomas's little brother.
He's shorter than Allen, much smarter and looks just like him. He's a good kid, someone you'd want to have around.
But you'll never meet him.
Nobody will. The images of him in Allen's mind are just that — imagined. Before his little brother could ever inhale one fresh breath of air, his life was ended.
A decade after Roe v. Wade, as the nation's conscience still squirmed in confusion and contention, as the issue continued to assert itself as an essential point in all politicians' platforms, as freedom of speech clashed with freedom of choice and shouts of "MURDERER!" met with women's rights activists, as protesters equipped with propaganda pictures and slogans lost sight of the real issue in a sea of religion, sex, class, morality, and law, amidst this swirl of controversy, a young mother unsure of her family's future made the hardest decision of her life.
Allen's mother was 21 when he was born. She learned the hard way that a door-to-door salesman and a college dropout working at McDonald's were terribly unprepared for the development of a new life. She didn't shy away from the challenge, but she soon found out what it meant to struggle, to be responsible, to tell the difference between a man who has a kid and a man who is a father.
Then came the choice. She would find out what sacrifice is really about.
Another pregnancy meant another mouth to feed, another back to clothe, another crying bundle of needs, another life to try to give a better chance. Raising Allen alone to succeed would already be a long shot. Multiply by two and the outlook is grim.
Should she sacrifice one child to save the other, or take a "moral" stand and risk the entire family's well being? Should she bring a new life into a situation where its chances of prospering are slim? Does the world need another "should've / could've," another sad story, another resentful youth destined to live most of his life with two and a half strikes against him?
Allen Thomas will grow to be a successful man because of the choice she made. He couldn't have otherwise lived in a good neighborhood or gone to good schools. College costs would have been out of the question. Another child would've spelled disaster for a family already struggling to get by.
The paradox in her choice is that she took his little brother's life to give Allen's a chance. That's a burden she bears every day. As a man, my words cannot even do justice to the physical and mental anguish inflicted upon a responsible woman who must make this decision — regardless of what she chooses. Yet she knows hers was the best choice in a terrible situation.
There exists an immense gray area in this overly polarized issue. Some pregnancies could kill the mother and child if carried out to birth. Women are raped and otherwise taken advantage of. Condoms break. Responsible people can be faced with an unwanted pregnancy.
If a child's life is truly valued, it should not be brought into an environment where it will not be nurtured properly. A child should not spend their life paying for mistakes their parents make.
That's not to say that all abortions are the right choice. Abortion shouldn't be abused as if it were birth control. Irresponsible behavior isn't excusable, but it's usually caused by lack of education, guidance and self-esteem. The need for abortions is often not the problem — it's a symptom.
Pro-life? It's not about life. It's not about re-affirming the injustice of murder. Simplifying the issue to this point shows complete ignorance of abortion's complexities, lack of true experience dealing with real-life situations and complete disregard for the women forced to make such decisions.
Pro-choice? It's not about choice. Women will make their choice regardless. Even nowadays, some women still perform illegal self-abortions. Some murder or abandon their born babies. If the legal option were completely eliminated, imagine how many more women would go this route. Legalized abortions give women a safe alternative and allow for professionals to offer emotional support services to help them get through the ordeal.
Is Allen's mother a murderer?
Large groups of self-appointed judges hurl accusations against her choice daily. These same people do little to educate those who need it most on safe sex, respect for one's body, the responsibilities of parenthood, and the pain of abortion and childbirth. They ignore legitimate reasons for abortion and the repercussions of prohibiting it.
Allen can only wonder what life would be like with a little brother. But he understands the sacrifice made for him — one he can never repay or challenge.
A columnist here recently said that with abortion, everyone loses. I say that without abortion, an entire family would have lost.
Allen Thomas' name was changed to preserve the family's privacy.
Eric Santos is a senior in commerce. His column appears Fridays. He can be reached at
Send letters to 
Printer-friendly version
|